How a YouTube Short Changed My Life: From Atheist to Believer

 I was raised as an atheist.

That said, my childhood was very happy and I am very thankful. We were raised to be respectful, kind and well-mannered. I have beautiful memories of growing up. For that reason, I don’t think atheists are amoral or bad people. I just think they're missing out immensely. 

I used to think that religion as a whole was a story people believed because they didn’t want to face reality. There was an odd peace in being an atheist. A kind of intellectual confidence.

I believed religious people followed blindly and if they just thought a little harder, they’d wake up. I’ve since learned that many Christians reflect deeply and often wrestle with their faith more honestly than I ever gave them credit.

So how did I go from a lifelong atheist mindset to writing about Christianity online?

It started, strangely enough, with YouTube Shorts.

I was doom-scrolling one night (I know) — watching videos about space. One came up with physicist Brian Cox.

 

If you don't want to/can't watch it, to summarise, he was asked what blows his mind most about the universe. He explained that it is inconceivable for us to image the sheer size.  

And in that moment… something clicked.

If something as real and scientifically proven as the universe is unimaginable then that gave my rational brain permission to consider God as real too. Science itself shows us that there are things beyond our mental limits. And that cracked my mind open.

I downloaded the YouVersion Bible app. I started reading the Gospels (devouring every word written in red, if you know you know). Then Proverbs—like my life depended on it. And now I read the Bible daily.

I listened to thinkers like Dr. John Lennox (a fellow Irishman, not that I’m a man haha) and Dr. Peter Kreeft. 

I looked into reputable scientists who speak openly about intelligent design, and how even the human cell functions like a microchip. Slowly, I began to understand that science doesn’t disprove God—it often points to Him.

The more I read scripture, the more I felt God revealing Himself to me. There were times when I felt his hand moving.

I learned how the New Testament writers—Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John—wrote from personal experience, often paying with their lives. I had always brushed them off as part of some man-made story. But that no longer made sense.

I watched The Chosen which has brought the gospels alive in my imagination. Read an article I wrote about The Chosen [here].

When I was an atheist I would cringe at people who find Jesus.

What I’ve realised is that my personality, my brain, my heart—they’re still here. I just know something now that I didn’t before.

I wish I could explain the depth of how atheist I was. A blog post doesn’t quite cut it. But the fact that I’m even writing this right now blows my mind.

I do carry regret and shame from my “before” life. Maybe I’ll share more about that in another post. But the Bible says I am made new in Christ and I believe that.

I’m not a theologian. I’m not a perfect Christian either if there is such a thing. I mess up often. I thought this journey would be easy—but it’s not. It’s hard. Jesus told us the road is difficult. That we all have a cross to carry. I understand that more and more each day.

I also have a healthy fear of God. I don’t want to use my blog, my shop or my voice in any way that dishonours Him. That fear keeps me accountable. It keeps me humble. I still have so much to learn, and that’s okay.

If you’ve read this far—thank you.

And if you’re curious, confused, skeptical, or just on your own journey—I’d love to hear your story. Scroll down and leave a comment or send me a message. I’m all ears.

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